My sweet 87 year old mother was taken to the hospital emergency room today because for over a month she has had severe problems keeping food down and attendant problems. None of the tests they have done have been able to find out what is wrong. She is very weak and so thin.
I am exhausted because she is falling through the various bureaucracy cracks. Even though she was so obviously ill and unable to care for herself, and my father who will be 91 in two weeks, and is great for his age, but is getting too frail to take care of her and the house, as well as he doesn't know how to care for her in this condition, the ER doctors were going to send her home because they couldn't find out what was wrong with her and the insurance won't pay if they can't give a diagnosis. Dad offered to pay from his pocket, but they said they could not allow that. The clincher is, she can't go back into the nursing home until she has been in the hospital for three days. So they are going to send her home?!!!
Finally after the nurse and doctors conferred, (after Mom had been in the cubicle all day) and they were able to find a bed in an overflowing hospital, they decided to put her in for the night. We'll see what they decide to do for her tomorrow.
My friends, just because their tests don't give them an answer, she is obviously a seriously ill woman. This same ailment happened to her 3 years ago, and she was almost dead before they were able to discover that she had a massive infection throughout her entire gastro-intestinal system. Due to the resulting effects of malnutrition she had a blood clot and then nearly bled to death internally from the blood thinners, so she was in intensive care and then hospitalized and fed through tubes for the whole summer and then in the nursing home for several months before she could regain enough strength to return to her home. She hasn't been able to keep house since then and Dad has done the cooking and housework. Unfortunately, her long time doctor retired since then and she is now dealing with new doctors who are unfamiliar with her case and one who really shows little interest in her case.
With my health conditions, I am unable to care for her and I am getting quite concerned and more than a little bit hot under the collar about the stupidity of medical bureaucracy (this includes insurance companies and Medicare regulations.) Even Jesus said that people were not made to serve the law, the law was made to serve the people.
They pay a large percentage of their monthly income for Medicare fees and supplemental insurance and this is what they get for it, after a lifetime of living decent, hardworking lives!
Thank you for giving me a place to rant. Please pray for strength and healing for Mom and Dad; for wisdom for the medical staff caring for her; and for love, patience, and serenity (not to mention a closed mouth) for me.
10 comments:
Aw Honey, I'm so sorry. I will say prayers for all you asked, and for you, too.
We had a similar situation last year with Jim's 89 year old mom. They were going to let her starve to death because she is an aspiration risk. We took her out of there and to a skilled nursing facility. She was so weak and we were sure it was the end. I'm happy to report that a year later she's doing better than ever and had her 90th birthday party on New Year's Day.
I hope you are able to find a caring place for her. They are out there, you just have to ask.
Miracles do happen. Hang in there, dear.
Oh Franny, of course my prayers are with you & your folks. I'm telling you though, don't keep your mouth closed. Rant out loud to the nurses, the drs, whoever you can. Go to the top if you have to. Patients who have a voice shouting for them will get the attention they need. If you have a Care Coodinator, get itouch with them. If you don't, ask for one from the hospital Discharge planner now! They can help you!!
I'm so sorry for you and your parents ! You all will be in my prayers, and I truly wish the doctors find the best solution for your mom...
Big hugs,
NADINE
I am so sorry to hear about your mom. I hope the doctors will get their acts together and figure out how to help your mom. You parents and you will be in my prayers.
Granny Fran, I am so sorry to hear this news. Hopefully wisdom will prevail and the doctors will figure out a way to help your mom! YOu and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
Hi Fran, I'm sending prayers for you and your parents. I hope you get some help from the doctors soon.
Hugs to you Fran!! I know how helpless you can feel in such a situation. I'll be praying for you all.
Fran, my heart is with you. You really have to be an advocate for the elderly. They are as helpless as infants and will be taken advantage of just as much. We screamed and yelled for 2 years while Mom was sick. It sounds like your Mom is doing better; I hope she continues to improve. I'm thinking of you!
You are all in my prayers, you and your family as well as the doctors and medical people treating your mom.
My prayers for all of you at this difficult time. I hope they can figure out the problem and get her eating again soon. You are so right, it should not have to be this difficult at this point in their lives.
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